Q ~ How many meter maids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A ~ Way, way, wayyyyy too many!

Often when I walk and start looking around at things I don't look to see what's in front. I'll step on the most unlevel, uneven chunk of sidewalk propped up at a 60 degree angle and violently trip and stumble in a manor brings me close to falling to the ground. I usually catch myself by grabbing that randomly placed metal pole in the ground or I keep trying to grasp something that doesn't exist and continue frantically flapping my hands down until I end up lucking out with a mailbox leg. The embarassment is 10x worse than the bruises I would have had from hitting the conrete. And if I do fall all the way down (like if Paul Bunyan or another giant person fell...and not that I, or you, are that big, but the act of toppling has to add inches and pounds to people. The smack is just too heavy. Just because the Biophysics II professor disagrees doesn't mean there has been the necessary research and testing) I have the initial reaction of being so very thankful that I landed on my hands, and not my face. But then after about 3 minutes I can't help but become preoccupied with the thin cuts and scuff marks on my palms and the horrid anticipation of blisters. Like when you are out camping and the weather turns unseasonably cold so you make a fire, which feels sooo toasty and nice, but then after those three minutes it's kind of like "too hot" and the smoke is blowing right into your face and you've realized there are no s'mores.Which is why I've recently taken to walking through peoples' yards. It's homey and provides a better cushion for the hands.